On the floor

This is killing me. My happiness fades every day. I wish you were happy with me again. My mind is so jumbled tonight. I don’t even know what to write or do. I’ve just tried all of my strategies and everything is getting worse. I don’t know how long I can stay strong. You are too much of my life. I just need you to come hold me. The only time this pain fades even a little bit is when you talk to me but you don’t want to talk. We don’t need to talk just come hold me please.

But yet if you were to come here I know I would just beg for you back. I never should have let you go. I’m so sorry. I should have tried harder. I don’t know how to get beyond this anymore.

I can barely get off the floor tonight. The only thing I feel are the tears. The silent buzz from my phone is a gentle reminder that you are so far away. Your responses make me see how happy you are. I try to let you know how I feel but is that even fair?

I guess I will try to get off this floor and continue to act like things are okay.

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